Ten Things I Hate About You: A Post About My Kitchen

On top of working full time and being the Artist-in-Residence at Art Central, I foolishly chose November as the month to start my long-awaited kitchen renovation project. I have been in the house for nearly five years and have managed to cook for a lot of people with basically next to nothing to work with. Don't let this post fool you! My kitchen may look cute from far away (because I added some cosmetic love to force myself to be patient with it) but it totally doesn't function. The final straw (which prompted my visit to the bank for a line of credit--eep!) was when a pyrex dish exploded as I took it out of the oven and it melted and fused itself to my hideous vinyl floor. I sat there crying among the pieces of hot molten glass and splattered roasted vegetables and realized, something had to give. I am so embarassed that I can barely post these photos, but I hope the final results will be such an amazing improvement that you will realize I am not insane for living in such a dump. So in preperation for demo day....

Ten Things I Hate About You: An Ode to my Kitchen

1. The fact that whatever jerk lived in the house before me only primed over the blue baseboards in this
half-assed way and didn't put nosing at the transition makes me crazy. And they don't even match the profile of the casing to the living room!

 2. Blue peel-and-stick vinyl tile from the 80's in a fake mosaic diamond pattern. They totally don't stick anymore and are obivously peeling. And yes, those dark splotches are burn marks.

3. The weird wall/cubby that used to be where the basement stairs were. Nice try trying to disguise it with that pot hanger that only fits my wok.

4. Counterspace. Can you find it? No? It is because its not there. Oh but there is plenty of bulkhead above the cabinets and so instead of putting extra cabinets for storage, some genius decided to cover over that space with drywall.

5. The cupboards are just half an inch too low for my Kitchen -Aid mixer to slide under so it is forced to take up most of the precious countertop real estate. Note the electrical outlet half covered by the awesome moulded laminate countertop, also in blue. So useful.

6. What to do with the weird space created by the vacant staircase. Why not an exposed pantry so everyone can have a view of my cleaning supplies and the cat food bowls while they eat!

7. No, the blue floor isn't two-tone. It is just bleached out from the sun.

8. Needless to say, I have chosen granite counters. Nice two tone paint too. Paper bag brown and pinky paper bag brown.

9. Yes, the french doors are lovely. The brown walls are not. Oh and do you see my dishwasher! No? It is because I don't have one. Also the track light in the top left doesn't work. Never has. Even after 4 different types of lightbulbs. Hence the lamp. I am really looking forward to proper lighting.

10. I have a gorgeous back deck which is accessed through those french doors. A true party deck, but to get to it you have to walk through my ugly kitchen. No more!


Will Hosier said...

I know we only met at the First Thursday event this week, but if you ever need to ask someone questions or opinions about materials, methods, appliances, fixtures, structures, electrics, virtually anything, I have extensive reno and mechanical experience, in addition to my computer, design, and photography experience.

So I might be able to help, or I know people who can.

Take care, and I hope the reno goes well.


WIll Hosier

Kate said...

Thanks Will,
I will definitley be in touch if something goes wrong!

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